Reclaim The Girl or Gurl You Truly Are!
Miss. Fiona why are people sometimes so unaccepting of sissies? What’s wrong with wanting to be girlie? -Nancy
That is a great question with no good answer unfortunately. You should be able to get your girl on without judgment or condemnation. It’s fun to be fancy, fabulous, feminine yet fierce, sporty, smart, savvy, strong, capable, with a razor sharp wit, creative, independent, and spirited –all of which captures the essence of girl/gurldom.
You aren’t alone in notices this prejudice though. Even as a biological girl I sometimes feel I have to defend my right to be seen as a girlie-girl because somewhere down the line the term “girlie” became synonymous with stereotypes of women as weak, dumb, lazy, vapid, bitchy, vain, superficial etc. How crazy is that? Why have modernized connotations associated negative attributes with being ultra-feminine? Perhaps this is the unspoken undercurrent that runs through the societal stigma of boys not being able to show their spectacular sissy sides without ridicule in a lot of what is still considered mainstream culture; Because deep down there is still an overwhelming sense of panic that being “ladylike” or en femme isn’t as desirable or worthy of respect as being “manly”? Sissification training and cross-dressing are both outlets of expression that you have every right to dabble in.
Where does this collective feeling come from that is so concerned that if we are allowed to show our love of glitter, glam, twee, fashion and all things apologetically adorable that we will somehow be rendered incapable of also being fully-formed, mature, thoughtful, courageous, generous, stoic, caring pillars of our respective communities and families? Another great question with no good answer.
Sometimes I think those that are full of envy and fear like to oversimpfy and objectify as a way to try and gain control over their own insecurities by projecting them onto others. It sounds like you have been experiencing the brunt of their narrow-mindedness.
Their misconception is not a reflection on you. They don’t define you -only you can do that for yourself. They haven’t earned and are completely unworthy of stealing your power.
We are all entitled to be as sexual, sensual, passionate, vulnerable, sensitive, open, nurturing and as bad-ass as we like. No explanations or compensations needed. You can be a whimsically floral pink-is-power, sparkly nymph that can take the world by storm and still knock the socks of your detractors with your kick-ass inner strength and enthusiasm.
So keep on shining as you are! 😉
If people underestimate you -so be it. Use that card to your own advantage, as a secret ace up your sleeve because guess what? You have the upper hand when people make assumptions because they are blindly looking up their own butts instead of seeing the truth.
Bring their preconceived notions crashing down as you rock the world in your own uniqe way and don’t be afraid to leave a trail of shimmer in your wake! 😀
Zooey Deschanel in New York Magazine and said:
“I think you can still be girlie and maintain your power. The fact that (you) associate being girlie with being non-threatening, that is… I mean, I can’t think of a more blatant example of playing into exactly the thing that we’re trying to fight against. I can’t be girlie? Why do I need to be defined aesthetically by someone else’s perceptions of what makes me seem like someone who should be taken seriously? I’m going to wear whatever I want to wear, because I’m expressing myself and I deserve that right. And I like the way that looks. You’re not demeaning yourself by acting girlie. I think the fact that people are associating being girlie with weakness, that needs to be examined. Not me dressing girlie. I don’t think that undermines my power at all.”